The beach is calling you. Or maybe it’s the mountains, the sea or a theme park. Wherever it is, you’re ready to plan a vacation but feel overwhelmed or unsure how to do so when you or someone in your travel party has executive function challenges.
Maybe you’ve tried to travel before and it didn’t go well and you’d like some help planning the next one- so you don’t have a repeat of the last one.
We can help you plan a vacation that will meet your expectations and help minimize any snags that might arise. No, nothing will be perfect, but with planning, it can be good. Really good!
Set Your Expectations
I am a neurotypical mom with a neurotypical spouse. When we think of vacation, we think of a break from day-to-day responsibilities, filled with fun, excitement, and entertainment. We want to simultaneously plan activities, and also go-with-the-flow.
We want to stay up late and sleep in late. We want to try foods and experiences that are new and unfamiliar. We want lights, sounds, and smells of places that aren’t home and we don’t mind traveling by car, plane or boat to get there.
My neurotypical 5-year-old son could easily handle most of that, but my neurodiverse 11-year-old daughter? She would feel anxious, nervous, and overwhelmed by most of that.
So when we planned our most recent trip to Universal Studios in Orlando Florida, we had to align our expectations (to have fun as a family!) with how to achieve that (what are her abilities?).
We needed to decide if we could get up and out early to get to the theme park when it opened. Could we eat in crowded, noisy restaurants? Could we fly or should we drive?
Could she share a room with her younger brother?
You’ll need to do the same. Consider the trip you want to take. Now consider all the things you need to do/have/see in order to make that trip possible. Is it realistic for you and your travel party?
Would your trip, as envisioned, require the person with executive function challenges to assume tasks that they are not equipped to handle? Would the trip, as envisioned, create too many obstacles for your travel party and create too many opportunities for sensory overload and/or emotional dysregulation?
Once you’ve matched your expectations to the abilities of everyone involved, you get to move on to the fun stuff- planning the trip!
Don’t Abandon What Works at Home
Since my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD & anxiety in February 2020, our whole family has spent a lot of time figuring out how to function in a way that meets everyone’s needs.
Our daily flow is intentional. We eat well-balanced meals at regular intervals. Everyone has access to self-regulation tools and techniques. Our homeschool day is child-led and allows for easy, self-directed transitions between topics. We exercise and we have structured routines surrounding self-care and bedtimes.
We safeguard these things because they help build autonomy, reduce stress, and create more peace in our home.
So, when we took our last vacation, we were careful to do the best we could to recreate what works at home. That meant we still had protein-dense meals and snacks regularly (allowing for the occasional treat) and still provided opportunities for self-regulation (access to technology, games and quiet spaces, even in the middle of a theme park).
We reduced the chances of overstimulation, when possible, by avoiding crowded restaurants and getting an accommodation pass that allowed us to bypass long lines.
We still kept to our bed times and bedtime routines. This meant we left the theme parks before they were closed for the day. We also brought our essential oil diffuser and humidifier from home so that my kids could have the smells and sounds they were used to having at night. My daughter also had bluetooth enabled sleep headphones so that she could drown out the sound of her brother breathing at night (she said this was the MOST useful item we got for this trip!)
You’ll need to consider the tools you use on a daily basis (food, exercise, regulation techniques, routines) and how to employ them while away from home. Make a plan and communicate it with everyone involved.
Consider the Considerations
In addition to the items you can control (food, betimes and activities) there may be options at your destination that can help you plan your visit. Many hotels will allow you to request certain accommodations, including the type of room. For us, that meant a room in a quiet spot away from the elevator and not facing the pool.
Many places also have accommodation passes for visible and non-visible disabilities. We’ve included links to some of the more popular travel destinations, but if yours is not on that list, you can visit their website or call in advance so that you can prepare to take advantage of those options.
On our recent trip to Universal Studios, we stopped at the guest services kiosk and requested an accommodation pass that allowed us to wait in virtual lines instead of standing in a crowded queue.
Many times, there will be sensory-sensitive options for shows and exhibits. Take advantage of those- they don’t cost extra and they are designed to help minimize overstimulation, reduce anxiety, and allow for a more enjoyable experience.
Accessibility Options at Popular Vacation Destinations
- Accessibility information at Universal Studios Orlando Florida
- The Cerebral Palsy Guide highlights 10 popular theme parks who offer accessibility passes.
- The International Board of Credentialing and Continuing Education Standards (IBCCES) provides training and certification programs designed to provide professionals with a better understanding of autism and other neurodivergencies. IBCCES has been the industry leader in cognitive disorder training and certification for education, healthcare, corporate and travel & entertainment professionals around the globe.
They offer a list of destinations, hotels, and attractions that are trained and certified in autism and special needs care.
Be Flexible
As the saying goes, “the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry”. It is important to be flexible in case your travel party needs a change of plans or a break from activities. Allowing for last minute changes can help rally a tired, overstimulated, and anxious travel party.
On this trip, my husband and I were willing to split up, each taking one kid for a short time if it meant giving one kid a quiet break, while the other rode a ride.
We also had a plan A and plan B for meals. If we had dinner reservations but could tell that eating in a noisy restaurant was going to present too many challenges for my daughter, we would call ahead and get the food to go. One night, at a noisy restaurant, after my daughter and I ordered our food, we stepped outside. When the food arrived my husband texted us and we came back inside to eat. Most nights we got dinner from the food court at our hotel and then we then took it back to our room for a picnic (which my kids loved!).
Now for the Fun Part
Once you’ve set your expectations, considered the abilities of the people in your travel party, controlled what you could, got accommodations where available, and adopted the “be flexible” mindset, you’re ready for your next vacation. It may not happen the way you planned, and there will always be small bumps in the road, but if you pay attention to the details mentioned above, you’ll be off to a great start to your next fun trip .